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choosing joy / messy middle / podcast / Season 6

How Your Intuition Can Help You Find More Joy (And What You Can Learn From Feeling Annoyed)

Something I’ve been really paying attention to recently is the role that tuning in to my own intuition plays in my day to day life. In this podcast episode, I’m sharing more about how to tap into your intuition, why it’s important to embrace what your intuition is telling you, and how being annoyed with something or someone can act as an invitation to get curious about what is really going on.

In a few past podcast episodes (and in my book), I talk about the power of acknowledging the need for leaving times of “being” and “doing” in our lives. As someone who lives in the US and has been raised in a capitalist society with hustle, growth, and getting ahead being considered the markers of a life well lived, it’s ingrained at an early age that our worth is wrapped up in how much we can do.

It’s not our fault that this becomes the default mode of thinking, either. Schools and universities, corporations and even health care and the armed forces all place a high value on the ways that people are the same. They prize good grades, high achievers, traditionally “healthy” individuals, and those folks who fall into desirable averages of height and weight (respectively). And each of these fields generally values productivity, people who stand out, and the people that work the hardest.

What this doesn’t necessarily leave much room for is our individuality.
And it doesn’t place much if any value on down time, creativity, rest, recharging, or spending time figuring out what makes each person unique.

That’s where intuition comes into play. We’re often told to focus on the “doing” stuff and begin to ignore the “being” side of things. We focus on deadlines, production schedules, likes, and follows instead of asking ourselves what we want, how we feel, and what feels natural to us.

So – let’s look at intuition and the role it plays. There are a few things here:

Our hearts want connection, but the hustle culture wants us to believe that we are all individuals trying to get ahead. Our intuition knows and believes that thrive when we are connected, have a community, and believe that when one person succeeds, it makes room for others to also succeed.

You intuition is likely reaching out to you in two ways:
1. A deep sense of knowing.  You may “just know” when your car needs to go into the shop, or when your friend or child is having a hard time. Trust that. We’ve been taught for too long to push those nudges aside. When you start to listen to them, and act on them, you see that they are powerful connections to what is really real.

2. In things that annoy you. I’ve noticed recently that annoyance is a powerful indicator of when I feel like something is “off.” Lots of times, annoyance pops up when someone has crossed a boundary, or even more commonly? I find that I feel annoyed when their request of me or my time mirrors what is expected of all of us by Hustle Culture.

In short, I find that my intuition alerts me to the fact that something is “off” with and I have discovered that this feeling shows up in what I had been interpreting as annoyance. Instead, it’s clear that my gut knew something far before I could articulate it. I “just knew” that this wasn’t a fit.

Some observations about intuition:
1. Give yourself permission to trust the nudges and moments that you get, whether they be of the “deep knowing” or “annoyance” variety.
2. Take action when it feels right, without questioning or judging yourself about it.
3. Be curious when you’re annoyed. Is it actually intuition picking up on something you haven’t articulated, yet?
4. What you feed grows. As you learn to listen to your intuition more, your ability to trust it and understand what you’re saying to yourself will increase. 

Resources

Dr. Ezzie Spencer on Jump Start Your Joy
Order Jump Start Your Joy: Heart-Centered Ways to Find Joy in the Messy Middle